relating to people

very often i've observed people noting on someone being too proud and therefore not being able to relate with people in the right way. for sure this happens often enough, but taking oneself for better than some other person is not the only way inhibiting a good relationship between them.
also the opposite, namely feeling too self conscious and less worthy than someone else, has really bad consequences, as obviously also under these conditions a relationship amongst equals is not possible.
in the first case, the proud person often tends to not take the other one seriously and might presume that their acting is only incomprehensible to them as the other person's motives are too stupid and plain as to bother with them. however, as can be seen often enough, this is quite not true.
with self-consciousness, ususally people devalue their own talents and identity, because they prefer to admire someone as often this is easier than focussing on the real reasons why they couldnt gain confidence in themselves. however, very often also this way leads to frustration, as people tend to feel resentful to others that miraculously always fail to see and appreciate their talents.
The solution to the problem of how to found a healthy relationship towards others can be found in a bible quote: >> "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself."<<-Matthew 22:37-40
Even for the non-believers I think this quotation bears acceptable wisdom. The first part brings to mind that people themselves are not the omnipotent power nor the most important entity on earth and therefore have some responsibility for their actions.
The second then states directly how a good relationship can be formed with others: By - first of all - loving your neighbour, accepting them as they are. But - and this to me seems crucial - it also says to love yourself. Neither more nor less than the others. There lies the trick which would resolve both issues mentioned above. On the basis of this balanced appreciation neither the pity of the proud for the stupid, nor the self depreciation of the self-conscious could grow as to threaten equal relationships.