relating to people

very often i've observed people noting on someone being too proud and therefore not being able to relate with people in the right way. for sure this happens often enough, but taking oneself for better than some other person is not the only way inhibiting a good relationship between them.
also the opposite, namely feeling too self conscious and less worthy than someone else, has really bad consequences, as obviously also under these conditions a relationship amongst equals is not possible.
in the first case, the proud person often tends to not take the other one seriously and might presume that their acting is only incomprehensible to them as the other person's motives are too stupid and plain as to bother with them. however, as can be seen often enough, this is quite not true.
with self-consciousness, ususally people devalue their own talents and identity, because they prefer to admire someone as often this is easier than focussing on the real reasons why they couldnt gain confidence in themselves. however, very often also this way leads to frustration, as people tend to feel resentful to others that miraculously always fail to see and appreciate their talents.
The solution to the problem of how to found a healthy relationship towards others can be found in a bible quote: >> "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself."<<-Matthew 22:37-40
Even for the non-believers I think this quotation bears acceptable wisdom. The first part brings to mind that people themselves are not the omnipotent power nor the most important entity on earth and therefore have some responsibility for their actions.
The second then states directly how a good relationship can be formed with others: By - first of all - loving your neighbour, accepting them as they are. But - and this to me seems crucial - it also says to love yourself. Neither more nor less than the others. There lies the trick which would resolve both issues mentioned above. On the basis of this balanced appreciation neither the pity of the proud for the stupid, nor the self depreciation of the self-conscious could grow as to threaten equal relationships.

wishful thinking

it would be so nice to travel to a place in europe where germans didnt make all that terrible mess during WW2... but i guess it's impossible, so i will have to get used to the knot in my stomach which is bound to form each time i read through a travel guide.

And there shall be jazz

or at least this is my plan after yesterday's success in improvising with piano and violin together with my cousin. I always wanted to try this but never could work up the confidence (especially not in public) as my very classical music education formed a safe but rather rigid corset to my experiments. And with improvisations... what if in the middle of performing you suddenly loose each other, the harmony, or the idea?!? what a terrifying idea! but - as so often in life, it does take surprisingly little for ending up in entirely new waters. and, consequently, once you end in there you have only two options - to sink or to swim... we opted for the latter and the result was simply fascinating! (probably more so for the two of us performing, as we had never before given it a try... what a mistake! ;) therefore, I have decided to try myself taking some more steps in that direction. if anyone of you has a good recommendation or tip for how to proceed, they would be appreciated very much.

The first steps

for my resocializing at my home are made.. in fact, it seemed to be surprisingly easy as two happy celebrations brought together a lot of people which I hadn't seen in a long time. It was a nice surprise though, that my four years of absence had a noticeable effect on the way the interaction between these people and me. When I left, with most of them (being younger friends of my parents) conversations only consisted in querying me about my where- and whatabouts but never I felt in the position to ask them personal things about themselves. In the end, who was I, being this dwarf that easily could have been their daughter?
Now I feel that my travelling and living abroad and on my own has given me quite some insights and ideas (of course not enough, so I will keep searching) and suddenly it has become possible to dive into the most interesting discussions with these people that have already so much more experience in life. Funnily enough, it even seems possible to tell them something new, so both parts win from the situation. As I was used to be unable to contribute, it is strange but very satisfying to not only draw from but also feed into that well of knowledge ;)

some borrowed wisdom

a train never goes faster than it's last car.

[a truth heard from martins]

lonely on the planet

it is an odd feeling and somehow takes getting used to..
but at the same time pleasurable and interesting as it is the foundation on which new structures start to form.

Ähnlichkeiten...

Manchmal sind die Leut wie ihre Hemden - kleinkariert!
Aber noch schlimmer ists wenn die Hemden sind wie die Leut ...
:)

the wedding

The original reason for my trip to the Baltics was the invitation to attend Diana's and Andrej's wedding in Vilnius. It was a very big and happy celebration with a lot of surprises (including a thunderstorm which nearly washed us away into the river and a lot of tasks to challenge the newlyweds, they however managed everything very bravely! ;)
I felt very touched when witnessing their union in the beautiful church Peter and Paul. Here is a picture of the really 'just married' couple with all their fancy assistants ;)



we celebrated till late in the night (or early in the morning, as you define it) and of course we had a lot of fun, food, dance, and play, meeting friend or just making new ones :)



the morning after brought a few tired faces, however the mood was good and everybody appreaciated to spend a relaxed day in sun and nature.
Concluding, I just really wish all the best for Andrej and Diana and hopefully we will all meet again soon ;)

Estonian joke

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